It has been quite some time since my last post. In part I have been busy but there is much more to it than that. My blogging is going to be somewhat rusty!
Following my little break I was quite looking forward to putting some posts together. I had even saved a couple of very rough drafts, thoughts more than anything.
Then, last Sunday, I found myself being rushed into hospital.
Not many will know that I have been struggling with my blood pressure for the last six months. Sudden and drastic drops have left me teetering on the edge of unconsciousness every week. More alarmingly, no medical experts can explain the drops.
On Sunday morning my carers had no choice but to phone the emergency services for an ambulance. Usually I can bounce back from the drop within 30 minutes or so but that day my body did not have enough fight to handle the bashing it was taking.
Within a couple of minutes of being transferred into my wheelchair I felt the usual symptoms of my blood pressure dropping. Lightheaded, dizzy and faint. No big panic. I have fast acting medication, ephedrine, to boost my blood pressure back up.
After taking these pills my condition continued to deteriorate. I lost all vision, bright white light was all I could see. My speech was slurred and I was dry retching. I remember my carers trying to keep me conscious. They were repeating my name and asking me to talk to them but I wasn’t able to respond. Although I was aware of the voices, they were distant. I felt like I was somewhere else, floating in an empty space but as much as I tried I couldn’t snap out of it.
I don’t mind admitting I was scared.
I was aware that an ambulance had been called so I was concentrating on staying with it. Knowing that help was on its way gave me something to focus on, a reason to stay awake.
It took the paramedics about 15 minutes to arrive and by then I was able to hold down a conversation. If it means anything to you, my blood pressure was 51/27. At that level it was difficult to understand how I could still be conscious. On top of my symptoms, an ECG gave the paramedics cause for concern regarding my heart so I was hastily stretchered into the ambulance with its blue lights flashing.
The first few hours in hospital are a bit of a blur. So many different doctors coming and going, hooked up to countless machines, blood being taken, IV antibiotics and fluids being given, a couple of X rays and an ultrasound.
I like to feel in control of my health so when the tables turn and I need to hand over control I don’t take it too well. I can only imagine I must have been a right grumpy bugger for the doctors to deal with!!
My mood worsened further when I found that the hospital had no WiFi and no signal on the mobile. Perhaps inconsequential in the grand scheme of things but by God, I missed my Internet!
No point getting into detail about all that happened over the next week. Treatment was administered, monitored and then adjusted on three or four occasions. I am now back home with no answers and still feeling lousy.
I just want to know what is wrong. I can handle being unwell, I am more than used to it, but I get worried when I don’t know (and neither do any of the consultants) what is going on.
Regardless, it is good to be back and I still need to keep reminding myself that things could be so much worse. I am thankful for all that I have.